NOT an ode to kikyo
by I am Inu-chan
Summary: Come, read and experience the simple joys of killing kikyo! (The nice thing is, you can read the chapters in any order)
1. Yay! kikyo is finally dead!

Disclaimer: I do not own kikyo or any of the other Inuyasha characters.

If you like kikyo, please stop reading this fanfic and read something else. If you dislike her, welcome!

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Verse one: 

Sung to the tune of Grandma got run over by a Reindeer

Kikyo got run over by a demon

Walking back to her hole late that night

Now you can say there's no such thing as demons

But the Inuyasha gang still does believe

Verse two:

Sung to the tune of Yankee Doodle

Now this is very bad luck

Kikyo did not die

The demon that did run over her did not kill her, boo-hoo

So attack her, ninjas did

Sliced her up they did, yes

Now she is finally dead

Now let us all rejoice, yea!

* * *

Now, wasn't that fun! No flames, please! If you really don't like this fanfic, then I dub you someone who likes kikyo shudder and it's your own fault you read this fic.

Anyways, please review, I love feedback.

-I am Inu-Chan


	2. Ways to torture the witch

Disclaimer: I do not own any Inu-yasha characters.

I am writing another chapter even though nobody asked me to. Am I really that bad of a writer?

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NOT an ode to kikyo

Chapter 2

Ways to torture the witch

Me: In the last chappie, kikyo dies and the world was a happier place. D However, here are more ways to hurt her in song, of course.

Sung to tune of Mary had a little lamb

Verse 1

Let's wack her with a big fat stick, a big fat stick, a big fat stick. Let's wack her with a big fat stick, oh what a happy day!

Verse 2

Spray toothpaste in her eye, in her eye, in her eye! Let's spray toothpaste in her eye, oh what a joyful day!

Verse 3

Let's kick her in the balls, in the balls, in the balls! Let's kick her where it counts, oh what a gleeful day!

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Me: Poor Kagome, for being her reincarnation. Let's have a moment of silence for poor Kagome. everyone bows head for moment of silence

kikyo: WHAT? KAGOME SHOULD BE PROUD OF BEING MY REINCARNATION! pause AND I DO NOT HAVE BALLS!

me: Yeah, whatever. kicks her in the balls

kikyo: passes out from extreme pain

me: Now that that's over, let us continue in our merry making.

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Verse 4

Let's push kikyo off a cliff, off a cliff, off a cliff! Let's push kikyo off a cliff, oh what fun we'll have!

Verse 5

Shall we burn her at the stake, at the stake, at the stake? Yes, we'll burn her at the stake, oh happy joy, joy!

I hope you enjoyed that chappie, I had fun writing it! - And don't forget to review, my wonderful readers!

-I am Inu-Chan

If you have to ask, kikyo's name is never capitalize in this piece because she is a stupid pig!


	3. Chinese water torture! In poetic form!

Disclaimer: I do not own any characters of Inu-Yasha. 

With that out of the way, let's continue with this gleeful fic!

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WARNING: ALL FANS OF kIKYO, GO AWAY! YOU SHOULDN'T EVEN HAVE READ THIS FAR!!!

Sung to the tune of ….darn! I can't think of any songs! So I'll have to rhyme. I need ideas for song melodies! Help me out here!

Looking around kikyo sees
People binding her hands and knees
    Bounding her to a chair by a wall
But she doesn't know why at all
A hooded person draws near
    And chuckles by her ear
'Have you heard of Chinese water torture?'
    'No' answers kikyo, unsure
Drip, drip, drip goes water in the room
    Each drip brings kikyo closer to her doom
Drip, drip, drip 
    kikyo starts to tighten her grip
She cannot get away from the dreadful sound
    The annoying sound, she tries to drown
But she does not succed
    She can't do any deed
To rid her from the annoying sound
Slowly her heart stops beating
    Driven to death from that horrible driping
She is no more, no more
    No more thoughts she bore
kikyo is gone

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Thanks to Icee-chan, who gave me the idea for Chinese water torture.

I am sorry it took me so long to update, I am an extremly lazy person. Remember: I need a song for next chapter, unless you want me to rhyme again. And review!

-Kawaii Kitsune and Hanyou


	4. Stuff from reviewers

Disclaimer: Inu-Yasha belongs to only Rumiko Takahashi…..and Kagome. And don't say he doesn't, its real plain to see Kagome and Inu-Yasha love each other. If this is news to you then youarereally early in the series, not very perceptive, or both! Well, on to the fic.   
Another disclaimer: I do not own any of the songs featured here.

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Ok, Inu-Chan wrote this to me in a review; it is sung to the tune of Blink 182's First Date. If you like it as much as I do, don't tell me, write her in a review of one of her stories. 

'In the car I just cant wait to pick you up on our very last date'   
'Is it cool if I stay away'   
'Is it wrong if I think you smell like dirt'   
'I hate every thing about your hair'   
'I can tell you didn't know what to'   
'I'm not scared of what you think'   
And I think you look like crap!'   
'you make me puke so I really can't eat'   
'Please go'   
'Away!'   
'this nights almost over'   
'Honest you are really ugly'   
'lets make this night end right now!'

* * *

Here are suggestions from sesshygirl3 (and it's the number 3, not 13) 

1. Silent night:

Silent night. Happy night. kikyo's dead. All is right. I wish I could have been there to see it. Her blood on the ground, and then I'd spit in it!

2. Frosty the Snowman:

kikyo the clay pot. Was a witchy wench we know. With her ugly face and a do for a nose. We were happy she'd crack one day.

3. Fairly odd parents theme:

kikyo is an average bitch who everyone understands Inu and Kagome should be giving her commands. "DIE WITCH!" gloom and doom for everyone around her is sure to happen instantly. but a magic little jewel can grant our every wish and you know what that would be! To kill kikyo! kill kill kill kikyo!

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If anyone else would like to see their stuff up here, write me your stuff in a review! It can be w/a song or as a poem (it doesn't have to rhyme). If you're looking for a really easy song, try Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star! It has the same rhythm as the alphabet song and each line has 7 syllables. 

Enjoy and as always, review!

-I am Inu-Chan


	5. Patrioticness!

Sorry for not being very active in my kikyo-hating, but here is another fun fun chapter! Yay! And so that I won't get in trouble, I do not own kikyo (nor do I want to) and I do not own the national anthem or "God Bless America".

Sung to tune of 'Star-Spangled Banner'

We all hate that witch

Of the name kikyo!

What so plainly we hate

Is everything about her.

We hate her whole being

With all of our own.

O'er the cliffs we throw her

Into rapids down below.

As we watch her fall down,

Laughing our heads off,

We felt no pity

At her own misfortune.

Now the world is a better place to live in

Now that kikyo is dead

We can all be joyful!

To the tune of "God Bless America"

I hate that kikyo,

And you know why!

She's annoying,

So selfish,

Why can't she just be done away with?

She's not human,

She's not demon,

We should kill her,

Oh what fun!

But before we do that,

She will suffer!

First we'll burn and torture

And then kill her!

This fic is not meant to make fun of our national anthem or "God Bless America", just kikyo. With that said, please review and tell me what you think! Personally, I don't think this is my best chappie, so flame me if you really wanna, just as long as you review.


End file.
